death of a loved one

I think of you daily
I miss you just as my much
everytime someone dies even on a show
it brings a tear to my eye knowing where you are

everyday I see you but your an untouchable dream
everyday I remeber the day you died
the day my life was changed never again can it be the same

the fears i face as I know everyone will end up dead just like you

people said the pain would ease that life would become livable
but to this day I feel the same
just like I did the day your brain turned to gooo
the your body laid there in front of me lifless with nothing to say

Time cant go back youll never be able to say you love me
nor give me the chance to be your big sis forever we are apart
forever ill beg for you to come back

I cant do it
cant pretend to be happy or wish that I dont want to die
if being dead means being with you
mabe im better off
mabe its selfish actually I know it is sometimes I dont know why I think like that mabe
cause I feel I need you or for peace of mind
but crystal my sis I need i sign from you are god just someone to tell me Ill be alright the string im holding on to is growing thin and I cant go thru another death ever again