You are there for everyone else, and they think they are there for you.
But they can't see the dark hole of emptiness inside- nor would I want them to.
I will be lost without him, yet I wil go through the motions of life- family, school, work.
The dark hole expands and contracts, but it is always there.
No therapy, no medication, no hospitilization will take this away.
So I must embrace it, just knowing that the blck hole will be there until die.
I fear that it will multiply or conjoin with every loved one's death.
Enough blackness, and I will disappear.