you were 16
i was 20
in your sister’s bedroom
with her, brandon
& eric
back before brandon
became gay

we had fucked a few times
before this
but you wanted it
that night
brandon, your sister
you & i
laid on your sister’s bed
with the lights out
and eric on the couch
you & i began to kiss
& touch
& you grabbed my hand
& pulled me down
into the basement
into what would eventually
become your room
where we’d build our own
world of love

walking by eric
i noticed
he was hugging a hammer
i don’t know why
but he was

i wanted to fuck
but also didn’t
because i didn’t want the other’s
to know or hear
but we did

you laid prone
& i was thrusting behind you
we found out that night
how to get you off
you needed it hard
& deep
& we went like that
for a while
you began to build
to orgasm
but at the final second
we mismatched our thrusts
& my dick
went SNAP!
& that’s all i could take
for that night
you jerked me off
into the condom
& then after that
it’s a blur

it was early/late
maybe 1a.m. or 2a.m.
when i left
& at 11:15p.m.
that night
of the same day
we wrecked in your car

close to orgasm
& close to death
in less than
24 hours

fate is funny
sometimes
but i loved you
from then on