Eternally Yours

By BlackRobedMage

Not very good. I think it needs work.

Take me into your arms
Hold me close to your heart
Place me in your eternal embrace
Never my soul wander

Tonight I make my sacrifice
In the purest form of darkness
I would die willingly
To be near your heart

My one, my only, my love
Eternally yours forever
Life begins with death
Finally, an eternity together

I give myself to you
Drink me whole in love
As pure sacrifice
Our deepest form of bonding

In our love we walk the land,
But together in infinity
Outlasting all the brightest stars
Immortal in eternity

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.

Published on Thursday, October 16, 2003. Filed under: "Poetry"

Comments on "Eternally Yours"

On Monday, October 20, 2003, Johny_D_Lewis (467) wrote:

very well done....great write
On Sunday, October 19, 2003, Rebel_Angel (321) wrote:

I think it is great and I don't think you should change a thing. I like it how it is...I also know how it feels to give the world for someone and they don't even notice.
A former member wrote: Sometimes leaving things vague really works as a great tool to tickle the minds of those peering in. I think it works perfectly in this case, very well done. ~Urban Shipwreck~
On Friday, October 17, 2003, BlackRobedMage (16) wrote:

I'm still working on it so yeah there's going to be more at the end and more details. I'll fix it when I get the new one done.
A former member wrote: Hmm...if you're thinking of expanding upon this...you could include some details. Right now it's a little vague which actually works out perfect...I really like this...no matter whata you think of it :P
On Thursday, October 16, 2003, Loserland (113) wrote:

i like it as is..but if you feel you expand, expand
On Thursday, October 16, 2003, WinterGrave (258) wrote:

I love this poem, it makes me think of the love of my life crystal, im gunna make he read this...on the other hand, i think the ending might be a little abrupt, you might wanna try and exspand it a bit...never theless, this poem is going tomy favorits the