Extinguished

Here I lie, 
The still air,, screaming of what once was
Ghosts of emotions long forgotten, Hovering,, Screaming of what once was
This day, 2 years it has been since I felt love's embrace
2 years since I have dared to feel, for fear it would drive me over the edge
That I would be driven mad,, And Scream for what once was

Now as I try to remember what once was 

I Cannot.

I do not remember how to feel
I do not remember how to love
I do not remember how to hate

My only feeling is an emptiness that I cannot shake
A haunting ghost that I cannot escape 
Over the years I have hoped to find someone that cared
Someone that could rekindle the spark of emotion 
The spark that I fear has been extinguished for good
But no one came.

Every day I go into the world with my facade of humanity
I act as expected and not a soul sees my pain
I come home and reacquaint myself with my only friend
and my greatest enemy
As the bottle leaves the shelf I only ask
I beg, for a brief reprieve from this cold emptiness inside me
And I scream for what once was.

But day by day my hope dwindles
Day by day I realize that no help is coming
I can see that love does not exist
And the cold emptiness grows
Like a cancer
I understand now that I am alone

Forever 
     and always

                  ALONE!
  (screaming for what once was)