There's a place called "Heaven"
somewhere in outer space.
It's where the perfect people go.
Must be a lonely place.

No sex.
No drugs.
No rock ' roll.
I'm told a funky smell.
Some guy named God is in control
Sounds like living hell.

He's vengeful AND He's wrathful.
It's obvious to me
that Heaven's not the kind of place
to spend eternity.

None of my friends'll be there.
Of that I have no doubt
and even if a few got in
they'd only get kicked out.

So when my time draws near
I only have one fear.
That I might go to Heaven
without my dope and beer.

And if I go to Heaven
listen and ye shall hear
a still small voice that's screamin',

"FUCKIN' GET ME OUT OF HERE."