Who is the monster?

The monster, scraping my ribs, trying to get out.

Whispering dirty words in my ear, willing me to say them, to give them life.

It claws at me, sharp nails leaving tracks in their wake.

It's always been with me, and probably always will be.

I can't escape, can't get rid of it.

Sometimes I don't want to get rid of it. 

This monster used to be my only friend, before I met you.

He stayed with me through the good times and the bad.

He never judged me, always loved me.

He got jealous though, didn't want me to leave him behind.

So I gave in, let him out.

It was just a little but it was enough to scare you off.

You saw the monster and thought it was me.

Fuck you for not looking deeper.