Fate Rejected
By fenix2337
just when i thought all was right,
just when it felt nothing could be better,
nothing could ever go wrong...
you spoke the words i have feared so long.
i bought the ring,
i made the plans,
i told the world
i was the luckiest man.
i bragged and i gloated,
i thanked and i prayed,
i swore to a god i never believed,
that he would not regret the day.
i loved you and honored you,
and gave you all i could give.
gave up my dreams for our chance to live.
no sacrifice could be too great,
as long as "yes" was what you'd say.
the stars had never been brighter,
the moon had never seemed so close,
my heart had never felt warmer,
my worries never so loose.
i brought the ring,
i followed the plan,
in front of the world
i asked to be your man.
i prayed and i hoped,
i cried and took a knee,
i swore undying love for eternity.
and then you crushed me.
the stars had burnt out,
the moon faded away,
my heart was in your hands,
crushed by what you had to say.
you had met another,
and with him you'd stay,
you and i were ruined from the start,
and i should turn and walk away.
you wish the best,
and still love me so,
but fate was wrong,
and i had to let you go.
just when i thought all was right,
just when it felt nothing could be better,
nothing could ever go wrong...
you drove the final nail into the coffin
that you had been secretly building for so long.
.::for.you.candyce::remember.it.well::.
Comments on "Fate Rejected"
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A former member wrote:
I'm going to hold my personal comments on this poem at this time. For now I just want to agree with the afore mentioned comments that you write very well..
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A former member wrote:
you pick up a brush and dip it into a deep black thought and w/o fear you express that bold thought to the ever contrasting canvas...the human mind
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A former member wrote:
just from what I've read so far I can tell you now they are paintings I hope you never charge an admission price to see....any human that can spill their soul in the face of judgement has respect from me.. ~MR~
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On Wednesday, February 1, 2006, Dissolving Poet
(560) wrote:
Wow it was full of emontions; a whirl wind of them painful and sad I loved it
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On Friday, January 27, 2006, Crimson Shade
(92) wrote:
Full emotions - i loved it, especially the stereotypical images of love (moon etc) - good write, great flow and rhythme to the poem... i hope that you moved on after this.
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A former member wrote:
wow this is a very deep poem. I accually felt all the feeling in this poem. maybe because I have been on both sides. Great write. :_ _ _ The River Crying Raven.