I am an intelligent, beautiful, caring and sensuous woman.
I was these things, I mean,
But instead, now I have you.
Why did you murder these qualities you once found so intriguing?
Now I am stupid, worthless and ugly.
No one else would ever want me sexually.
You remind me of this often.
I feel as if my soul was stolen away,
That I am absolutely no one in this world.
I have no identity, except for the one you allow me to borrow.
I am only here to wait on you, to make sure you lift not one of those lily-white,
Smooth and uncalloused fingers,
That you do not for yourself,
As you have taken on the task of my master, my mind, my world.
This world of hell.
Every so often, as I pass a mirror, perhaps,
I catch a fleeting glimpse of who I once was.
And every so often or more I mourn the loss of me
And I pray for the resurrection of my being.