Hell Hounds
By Possesion
burning, aching, feet aflame.
running, faster, breathing harsh.
tearing through memories, faster.
anger rises, vile acid rises further.
hounds, vicious, immune to pains.
chasing, nipping at the heels, of the poor.
unescapable, running faster, farther, breathing.
sharp, pain collides into your soul, your body.
every ounce of you moving on but not slowed.
body screaming, heels bleeding, heart pounding.
hope, light, fresh air, collect into your lungs, taken in.
but too late, because you've stopped running,
hounds first, the back of your leg, taking you down faster.
swarming, and alarming howl rising, hatred, ferocious screams.
one by one tearing out the heart, one by one taken down,
the world bearing down, devouring my heart, stealing my soul,
I no longer run to escape, i run to chase, to kill.
Comments on "Hell Hounds"
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A former member wrote:
I actually liked the visual effect on the page, how it tapered upwards. It was almost as if, the more panicked the writing got, the more words you had to fit into a line, like you felt like you were running out of time. And the fact that the final line is shorter instills a sort of cold calm. I like.
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A former member wrote:
that one is kool
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On Tuesday, September 13, 2005, MidSummers Eve
(38) wrote:
i like the switch at the end, you joined that which chased you, and chase in kind.
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A former member wrote:
My god, what a lot of words!
use them wisely
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On Thursday, September 1, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
this is a good read... excellent fast paced action and horror...
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On Thursday, September 1, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
...i think it can be even better, however... more work can be done on the flow of it. There are several long sentences in amongst the short bursts of fear and pain...
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On Thursday, September 1, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(357) wrote:
...i think either shorten them or put them in one group... perhaps a bunch of longer sentences as time slows down at the moment of capture/death...
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On Sunday, August 28, 2005, abattoir
(115) wrote:
adrenaline...this poem is badass...
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On Monday, August 15, 2005, Doc
(143) wrote:
Thats probably the best one ive read yet. My heart started beating quickly as thepoem progressed.
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On Wednesday, August 17, 2005, Possesion
(136) wrote:
Awh, I'm glad it's good, I often find myself looking it over questionably.
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On Sunday, August 7, 2005, capt_funguy
(777) wrote:
this was cool ... your ceaseless stream without a breath was a nice touch in making this a " run through" as well as a read through ... dug the freedom you write with .... funguy