Pain-killers

Daddy likes his women silent.
And I can never shut my mouth.
That’s why he hates me.
But silent I could never be.

I used to try and never talk.
To just focus on taking a long hard walk.
But it never worked. It always ended with a scream.
He wanted me to die, or so it seemed.

They hate me.
I hate them too.
I've given up yelling fuck you, fuck you.
I hear my family wish i were dead,
and the ache grows worse in my head.

I want to reach for a knife,
But I know they aren’t worth my life.
I’ll be sent away, strapped down and talked to
By people who don’t even know what I am. Or who.

Pop a pill, maybe two.
Float above every problem.
Forget who I am.
Forget who I was.
I’ll never be what they want.
But I can be who I am.