Beside Me

By The Guardian Angel

The only thing I can count on these days is things not going 
as planned. These days where I try moving 
forwards still leave me feeling stuck in reverse

I'm not young enough to keep holding onto 
all my dreams, but I'm still not old
enough to give up on them all just yet.

Everything far off looks so tempting and
beautiful. It's the things right in front
of me I keep running away from.

In the end neither of those things really change
for the better. So that's why I've decided to
just let them be and acknowledge the truth.

Since being hated is what I fear the most, it's
like I keep searching for reasons to be hated.
Saying "I can't stand the world we live in".

Sure there's plenty to hate, but that's not the
whole issue here. Right now I'll confess it all to you.

I can't just go along with everything. There's plenty
that makes me worry. Even the smallest things
can leave me crying, angry, and shouting.

But if there's any a time when good things
come along and I'm laughing as loud as I
can, I want you right there by my side.

I joke around, saying things like: "I want to
be happy". But I suppose some truth is mixed in there.

I'm looking for that person, thing, or place
that will grant me happiness...but just 
what form does "happiness" take?

For everything I accomplish, the list of things I've
given up on grows ever longer. "That's just how
the world works" is what I resign myself to.

But as you get older, you realize there's a few
things that you just can't let go of. So right now
I'm going to tell you the honest truth of it all.

I'm a terrible liar, I hide how I really feel,
and I'm always causing you trouble with the
complicated, demanding things I say and ask.

But what I really want to tell you is one simple thing:
There's no one else I'd rather have by my side.

Nothing stays the same, but sometimes I can't help
but cling on to hope. It always feels like I'm losing
my grasp on what's most precious to me.

But somehow I came across them once more,
remembering what was once forgotten. Each 
time being reminded of what you meant to me.

I'm a terrible liar, I hide how I really feel,
and I'm always causing you trouble with the
complicated, demanding things I say and ask.

But what I really want to tell you is one simple thing:
There's no one else I'd rather have by my side.

Is it fine if I stay right here next to you?

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Copyright 2014 The Guardian Angel
Published on Thursday, July 17, 2014.     Filed under: "Personal" and "Poetry"
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