I know you’re in there, I can see your dancing shadow
Come in, come in, don’t be shy, it’s been a while
I see you haven’t changed, still as wild as ever
Can I make you a tea or coffee? Of course, I forgot,
You’ve never liked water

We have quite some catching up to do
Well, ever since I retired from the brigade, life’s gone downhill
I lost my wife three years ago, rest of the family barely call
The only person I see regularly is my Doctor
All he does is talk nonsense medical speak
Something about Al Simers, whoever that is

When the family eventually do me the honour of a visit
They keep banging on that I should be in a home
THIS is my home! I’m not just going to hand it over to some stranger!

So what about you? I know we never did see eye to eye
But I must say it’s always nice to see a familiar face
We had some run-ins didn’t we? All those years ago
For what it’s worth, we always had our disagreements
But what is life without the occasional conflict?

Now, I hope you don’t mind if I turn on the ceiling fan
It’s getting awfully hot in here.