Complicated Love

There is something that creates
It lulls and it forcefully permeates

Through my eyes
your shaking breath
In your sleep.....
in a bottle I keep...

I wish as you slowly kissed me....
your skin would turn cold

I wish, sometimes...
you would temporarily  die in my arms
like a fainting woman.
So I can carefully lay you on that flower bed
Remove your clothes

Is your desire to be inside me simply...
the child yearning to go back inside his mother
To be warm
silent
unknowing....like me?
Are you just another like me.
I understand you.


They tell me I'm too young to understand,
but as I hold your head onto my chest,
I feel your vulnerability.

You are a man, developed into an infant...
I've become someone you need,
For the first time your breath becomes like a cry

I feel so united to you,
like we are children holding hands,
from past lives....
Is it wrong...maybe
Maybe I shouldn't hold you this way

I should see how sad you are, lonley
Empty you are.

Love doesn't fill, When I love you, I love you because I
I know that emptiness you feel,
we feel it together.

When you close your eyes and they roll back
I can see how  gorgeous you are....
your body is poetry and perfectly fitting to all my doubts.

Your large in mind, mature, much greater than me
but in this flower bed...my dear.

We know eachother like old veins rupturing into bruises....
Under you the bruises make sense.
Over you the bruises become my personal tears
that run down your cheeks.

I'm so sorry I betrayed you.


You're daughter.