Taming.
By the Id
Choking.
on cloud dense claustrophobia,
Gazing.
the empyreal sky remorseless
My temptations!
humble heavens to dust
Rusted sweat drips.
in
harmony with
my acetone tongue kiss
and your eyes, they shift
The gaze that should lift
was a let
down
and was left hanging ‘round
in my own slack-jawed exhaustion
and I've found
peace
in
not
knowing
you.
Author's Note:
The aftermath of unconscious textingAwards
Comments on "Taming."
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On Friday, October 11, 2013, Salty Ships
(30) wrote:
Your form and placement made this fun to read. It was almost playful and that combined with the real message of the work created such an interesting piece. It's ambitious and it succeeds. I'm glad that I've found you.
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A former member wrote:
the lilt and tilt of form definitely contributed to the power of this piece. "cloud dense claustrophobia" particularly stunned me because i've tried to capture that feeling so many times and could never sum it up in just three words. where i fumble over my tongue and scramble for the proper words to convey my feelings, always so long-winded and desperate to get my point across, you know just where to stick the needles and pins. A teacher once told me that poetry is saying everything in as few words as possible. i agree with that to an extent. there is no doubt of your poetic prowess. there is a cyclical nature to this piece. it evolves as it revolves, and as always, i am much impressed. you have such a unique style and voice, yet familiar like songs that resonated deeply within me once but i cannot place, and your titles always add that little something extra that makes your works feel so complete.
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On Wednesday, October 9, 2013, King_Crazy_Dave
(45) wrote:
this overall is a really cool poem but its hard to read because my imagination is vivid enough to recall the taste of acetone.
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On Monday, July 14, 2014, the Id
(31) wrote:
Amen, my friend. was hard to write for that same reason