Finality of Depression

This feeling of shifting, as gravel shifts through a hopper,
attempting to eliminate the insignificant pieces,
I feel as if I am trapped in that category,
but I have grown weary of all this.

Having to watch myself fall apart,
like a corpse unearthed form a decade of slumber,
living in the downward spiral I call a life,
embracing the sorrow for all that was left.

I realize, simply I don't want it anymore,
instead of roaming downward on my coiled staircase,
I would rather turn and journey back the way I came,
against all the obstacles before me.

Today I decide to suck it up,
no longer incarcerated inside my mind,
freedom at last from the frozen clutch you still have on my shattered heart,
I wear my scars proudly a simple reminder of who you are.

The loss I feel for you is great,
but perhaps it was you who lost me,
the flames I have tormented myself with,
finally have extingiushed.

This new life I shall embrace,
what possibilities lay before me I do not know,
if fate deems it perhaps a smile just may cross my face once again,
maybe you'll even see it.

This is the moment I begin anew,
my life is my curse,
fueled by all the decisions that lay bare before me,
along with a dawning new day,
which I shall see to its fullest.