Before You Read. It is very rare for me to put so much raw emotion into something. However, I think I have captured the worst moments of my life here. If you have any questions concerning this piece, don't hesitate to ask. Thank you, I hope you enjoy it. :]


I watched as the strongest man I ever knew,
struggled to breathe on a ventilator...
and it took every ounce of what he had,
to squeeze my hand to tell me he loved me.

I listened as the most alive woman I knew,
denied cancer treatment...
because she needed to die.

I've heard the desperations in my best friends voice.
As she told me our childhood friend had been in a car wreck.
Then explain to me why they couldn't keep him alive.

I've seen babies born,
and I've held them as they died.
Images that keep me awake at night.

I felt for the mothers who send their children off to war,
to fight for something they don't believe in.
Then stand by them as they're layed to rest.

I've smelt the whiskey of my fathers breath,
as he stood over me with a belt...
and I watched him drive away and never come back.

I heard the only man I've ever loved,
Tell me that I wasn't cutting it anymore.
That he didn't ask for my virginity,
and I'll smile when I see him.

I've held my mother all the nights she couldn't take it anymore,
and hid pills in my toy chest.

I witnessed my ex stepfather,
throw my puppy against a wall.
Then explain that I didn't pay for it,
so why cry when it's neck snapped.

I tasted confused tears as I was dropped off a a children's home,
and wonder why they didn't want me anymore.

I've felt the cold steel of a gun put to my head,
before the cops showed up that night.
He said he wasn't going alone.

I've smelt the iced over ground and dead grass,
as I hid in a ditch,
running for my life..

I was touched in places a 5 year old should never be touched,
and yelled at because I was "Making it up."

Most of all, I've felt forgiveness.
Most of all, I've seen life.
Most of all, I've heard destiny.
Most of all, I've smelt victory.