I snapped out of my morbid daydream of cheerleaders being crucified when I heard footsteps coming towards me. "And what are you doing, Miss Hunger?" The baritone voice of Mr. Nielsen sounded in my ears. "Not thinking of skipping class again, are you?" I could feel his peircing eyes focus on my blushing face as his crooked smile slithered onto his skimpy lips. I closed my locker and turned to face my teacher. His nose lept out at me, and I took a step back to avoid getting poked in the eye with his Pinnochioesque nose job. If that was his real nose, he might have gotten caught on his mother's vaginal opening. Boy, that would have hurt. He would have been surgically removed; I hoped his mom's vagaina survived with the surgery. If not, she would have been the vaginaless woman...or at least her entrance would be forever ruined.

I started coughing to cover up my curling lips as I imagined his mother in a birthring room, being operated on, trying to push this monstrosity out of her.

'He's a real live Pinnochio. He got his wish to be a real boy!' I said to myself, laughing silently as I imagine ripping it off his egg shaped head with a meat hook and poking out his beady eyes with it; however, I could rape him in the ass with it because it is about 8 inches long. It would suffice just fine. I could also sharpen it and do my homework with it, but thats not necessary because I dont do homework on a nightly basis. I just pretend I am to please those around me, especially Mr. Ed Nielsen, the drill sergeant of my nightmares. But then again, nightmares are my sweetest dreams, so I enjoy his excessive workload and tormenting teaching styles. I have a theory. I would want to state it out loud someday in front of the whole school, preferablly graduation, but I can't so I'm doomed to be a suckup in the rest of my educational career. Just like my rival, the emaciated devil of a cheerleader: Brittany Ryerson. My jokes became a living hell as I relived some of the moments of complete and total confusion back in the day when I was friends with this beast. Oh how she ripped my heart out and smashed it over and over again with her tantalizing acts of complete jealousy and rage. I don't know if she was actually jealous, I just assumed that because she was always stealing my clothes and taking credit for the fashion sense. Thats one of the reasons I drastically changed...for the better.