Pick Pocket

walking through life like an honest stranger
holding fast to my vulnerabilties like a wallet in imenent danger
talking to you but all the time i am withholding 
my thoughts as down this path my life is unfolding 
what would you think of me if you knew where i have been
the things im not proud of the wounds i still have open
the people i let close to me because of a bottomless love
you would think i am unworthy of possessing the knowledge above
what i have displayed in my behavior in my actions and intents
but the truth is that I’ve sacrificed myself in ways i can’t repent
growing up knowing love as a constant struggle
i hoped an endless amount of effort would provide a life in love thats supple
but learning that the end result doesn’t justify the cost
unfortunately not before realizing how much I’ve already lost
afraid to show all my cards again, afraid that everything is the price
for feeling so fiercely about the love that i can and should provide
am i alone in the notion that my heart is only worth the weight 
of the blood and pain it can endure for its destined mate?
maybe ive assumed for too long that love means a considerable amount of pain 
a bucket you dump till its empty before it can be filled again
if that is truly the cost i will give everything if there is anything left
afraid that in the end love is just a synonym for theft.