Questions of a Lost Soul......

I have been gone for what seems like an eternity. Not sure what is and isn't real anymore. I'm lost...... Like a ghost traveling endlessly.  Not sure how to find my way back..... Back to the old me... Back to my sanity. My mind screams for help.... Yet I am so afraid, I can't find the courage to open up and let my pains, fears, my thoughts pass through these lips. So they just sit in my mind eating me alive everyday that I have to continue to walk this earth. I feel as if I will never find my place.  Where I belong. Where I am free.  Free of these chains that have pulled me under for so long. So what do I do? Where do I go? Will I ever be ME again? The girl who was so confident....so beautiful....who was so happy.....the girl whose soul was so pure and full of love that even her eyes smiled when you looked into them. Those eyes that were once so illuminating... A gorgeous, hypnotic, sparkling, emerald green.  Now dark, full of sadness and hate. Where did she go???? Is there even a small chance that she can be found......Does she even want to be found?????