Shame, the underlying feeling
Positivity is a flaky armor that’s peeling
Beginning to expose my raw flesh underneath
Things don’t bounce off, they penetrate, allowing negativity to seep
Seep out of the shredded scar tissue
Returning to my old ways, how can I make it through?
When therapy is on pause because of my own doing
A tough realization as feelings of regret are brewing
When it comes down to it, attendance really does matter
As it all sinks in, I only continue to become sadder
Even if it’s from things like a med change, intense anxiety
Or feeling very ill because of my pregnancy
Are they preparing me for the way life works?
Or have I just missed too much material? Either way it hurts
It feels so abrupt even though I know that’s not the case
Right now I give up, perhaps my next chance I will not waste