Absence appearing around spiteful heart aches. The actions of one are defined through blind ambition and careful mistakes. Don't try to act as though you know my misery. Each elaborate thought and meticulous amount of contemplation form the base of my emotional agony. I'm aware of the every consequence, but can't be more apathetic. I want nothing more than to cut open my wrists, because if not i'd be lost into sheer maddness. I don't want your attention. I just need to find balance. The guilt of what I've done increases the pain. The love i have lost screams in a hotel for the confusion to go away. So night after treacherous night, the silence of sick heart beats resurrect these melancholic attempts to be complete. In every worn out raped kind of sleep, I lay and hope not ever to dream. For it were my fantasies that led to the nightmare i breathe in. I can't ever wake up. I don't ever want to see their faces again...