Revisiting


It was an accident, I say to you
I said I wanted her dead but didn't mean to
Kill her, I swear, I love her
But just look at what she made me do

The richness of her life stains my hands
Runs through my fingers and into the sand
I long to be free of her
But, alas, God has other plans

She struggled and fought, but, no sound did she make
Because, I squeezed and twisted ‘till I felt her neck break
Now, I’m standing by the grave above her
Thinking this may have been a mistake.

Though she’s dead and buried I hear her heartbeat, still
Deep inside my head the silence is filled
With the sound of another
Fight and breaking glass and old wounds that won’t heal

She occupies every waking thought and torments my dreams
Even from my cemetery she calls out to me it seems
She’s just like the others
I still hear their begging, I still hear their screams.

I go back to visit every now and again
To exhume those old memories and re-live that old pain
I’ve missed her, so much, my lover
I can’t get her out of my brain

I have to feel my fingers in her tangled hair
Run my hands over her body, smooth and fair
Kiss her lips: sweet, like no other
Cup her breasts; perfect and bare.

One last time I’ve come to be inside her
And, after, just to lay beside her
Until the sun comes up and over
And, unto the very end I will abide her.