What a beautiful sleepless night is this,

That spawns an eternity of confusions,

Such a cesspool of emotions,

Spinning so wildly in my brain,

So that there is no end to the insanity,

There is no hope for me to be sane.

What are these thoughts I have?

Tearing through my brain so quietly,

Like a million razor blades rusty and dull,

And you think I’m staring blankly.

All of these choices that I must make,

When I am ignorant of knowledgeable answers,

And frightened to death of the chances I must take,

It really becomes too much to stand.

I have entered into an unfamiliar world,

In which my control is not a peak,

With all of these feelings I can’t comprehend,

It makes me feel completely weak.

I just wish the confusion would subside,

That the horrid weakness would die.

So badly do I want my old self back?

Since the person I have become is a stranger,

And Is stumbling blindly though an impenetrable haze,

Make the pain disappear,

Make the fear go away,

Make the emotions die,

So I may become the monster I am so used to,

So that no more shall I cry.