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manipulated like the strings of street guitars
and as beaten as the keys of unpolished pianos
i've been wondering for a short forever
if i am a fool long lost within time
i have to ask you,
is this going anywhere?

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weeping for the fabrications born between the whispered romances
recited to innocence deaf to the drunk and the tainted
ill break porcelain shards beneath the pallid moon to piece together
something durable and worthy of being held in your eyes
and ill pluck the faeries from each breeze i swallow
to make myself into something more important
than those stickfigure whores you watch so closely.

because i know you better than you think, love.

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i'm not sure how much longer i can do this
memorizing the lines of my notebook
carelessly painted with ink littered with sapphire
and so i'll ignite my memories with the birth of new dreams
because sometimes my dreams hold so much more
than a neglected pen and scorched paper.

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clutching fragments of stars from my fallen midnight
i've always told you that pictures are worth more
than words strung together around my heart
because your smile held more than my world for so long
now decorated with anorexic girls dressed in silver
and filmstrips of what could have been
if i had given you more than my heart and soul.

and no longer will i paint my face to impress you
and no longer will i dress like a slut to please you
because i'm lost in my dreams again.

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and tonight,
tonight i know i deserve better
i'm more than you'll ever be.

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