Poetry Contest: NFL Football Teams and Nicknames

NFL Football Teams and Nicknames Results

Contest Creator: dwells

Hi - I'll post an example rather than describe:
I tried to rhyme a poem about a crabby old guy from "Pissedburg" (Pittsburg), who told a young girl from "Philly" (Philadelphia), that he would "steal her" (Steelers), but she flew away with an "eagle" (Eagles). Thus covering two teams in one short piece - the Pittsburg Steelers and Philadelphia Eagles.
BUT IT HAD TO RHYME AND MAKE SENSE, and I failed... Consequently, maybe you all can do better.
Judging criteria quantifies the number of total teams mentioned by you (31 teams possible), AND the number of nicknames / mascots also included. For example "Miami (1) and Dolphins (1) - for a total of "2" points, PLUS TWO BONUS POINTS for including both names - or some phonetic representation there of.
Finally, a multiplier as to quality of artistic endeavor, from one to ten (much as the DP rating system).
Apologies to the ladies and non-USA members - but just use the cities and the mascots / nicknames, for any potential list that you care to include in your rhyming poem.
Please, no travelogues or wholesale broadcasting of nonsense names that do not add to the artistic flavor.
P.S. - There will be a tailgate party at the Super Bowl with the winner of this contest required to streak naked at halftime, across the 50 yard line. Extra points for mooning Madonna! (KIDDING).
In case you were catatonic - only 20 ducats to the winner; with no obligations
No football knowledge is necessary and will not be considered as advantageous. Cheers! - dwells

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