murderedhearts_blood
Hi, I’m adopted, so I have MANY MORE names than just three, but my main names are Jasemine Alexis Paris-Kautzman-Goldman(-Romanov), Karen Cynthia Lynch, & Anastasia Katiryna Lynch-Romanov. Yes, I belong to/with the Romanov family/dynasty which I am so proud of, and I hope that our dynasty will come back as soon as possible. It is extremely strange, but I actually shared this DNA/family in a PAST LIFE, of which I told my story from the age of two or three until I was about to begin fifth grade. Until I died in 2009 for the first time (and a plethora of times in one evening), I had actually completely forgotten about the story that I used to tell when I was little (which I told until I got tired of people not believing me), but I was shocked by what I found. I didn’t believe in past lives before I died, and I dropped my various religious beliefs that I had &/or was forced to have up until then. However, what I saw, the information that was poured (although, it was more like all of that information was INGRAINED) into my mind was definitely put there by SOME SORT of creator of the universe/everything… that was made perfectly clear, but it was insane that I had gotten every single detail from what happened to us in the early 1900’s [in regards to the tragedy and heinous acts that were forced upon my family and me in Russia which was perpetrated by the Bolsheviks… I mean, from the “really big knives” [AKA: swords (but I wasn’t able to watch TV or movies growing up, nor could I even use the computer later on in life which only became a thing/more available WELL AFTER I had stopped telling my MOST RECENT previous past life story… & I say it like that because I saw my past lives occur ABOUT every 60/70-100 years. However, I DID see a TINY BLIP of a past life during WWII, BUT, as I came to learn as I saw more and more past lives, AND as I noticed the patterns of each life, how short &/or long they were and felt to me, and/or from the feelings that I was given by the creator/God/The Divine Goddess (or whatever you want to call the Higher Power who made their presence/themselves MORE THAN KNOWN to me when I died… each time, including the plethora of times that I died that evening alone…), I HAD to have been a baby or very small child who had been murdered by the Nazis in WWII… nothing else made sense, and it felt like I was correct about what I was being shown/what I was made to feel about that one, AND ALL of the ones where my life was cut short as a baby and/or as a child…)], the fact that we (the females) had made our dresses “bulletproof,” but that my papa and brother were killed first by “smaller hand cannons” (lol, yeah, I was really sheltered as a kid, as you can tell, haha!) because the men couldn’t do that to their clothes with our “family heirlooms and jewels,” and literally everything else that I couldn’t have possibly known about due to my ridiculously sheltered and strict Roman Catholic upbringing…), and how is girls and women had to be stabbed with the “really big knives” in order for them to kill us… and how I ACTUALLY DID carry the exact same markings on my chin from a sword wound that I had gotten from that past life trauma because I came back too soon after that, and even too soon after the one during WWII. Most were farther apart from each other than that, but I still had so many past lives that I didn’t get to live far enough through, and was sent back early. You guys are in for a treat when you die! I have NEVER seen or felt anything like it… I’d never felt more peaceful/at peace (and more like I’d never felt more peaceful during my entire life COMBINED than I felt when I went to what most people call Heaven…), happy (I dont think I had ever felt TRUE happiness before that), joyful, and so many more wonderful feelings like that in my entire life [and, as I said, during every moment during this lifetime COMBINED! It is WORTH the wait! Yes, I killed myself that time, but I don’t condone what I did. Yes, I still think about suicide literally every second of every single day, and being torn back here was absolutely excruciating, so excruciating that I still feel that pain today. I’m still angry about them bringing me back when I had tried to kill myself so many times before then, and clearly didn’t want to live… ESPECIALLY considering ALL of the other extremely traumatic and heinous things that have happened to me AFTER I was brought back to life (as if I hadn’t already been through enough of that sick sh*t before I died…). PLEASE DO NOT DO WHAT I DID! Yes, it was sadistic of them to bring me back if you take into account everything that I had been through/was forced to go through before I died, and maybe even especially all of the things that I was forced to endure YET AGAIN AFTER I a was brought back. However, PLEASE listen to me. I was shown that not everyone who commits suicide is so lucky to be able to get to that wonderful place, and I know of some people who experienced hell instead of Heaven when they had actually done the same thing and succeeded at killing themselves… it’s not worth the risk, and it’s well worth the wait… even though I am in constant excruciating pain, I still feel like that experience is MORE THAN WORTH THE PAIN AND WAIT! I mean, LITERALLY EVERYTHING was COVERED/SURROUNDED by THE MOST BEAUTIFUL, PURE (&, for lack of a better word, CELESTIAL) almost-transparent white light that I’ve ever seen (and of which you CANNOT experience &/or see ANYTHING like it on earth, AND/OR EVEN in the universe!), my most burning questions (and more) were answered, and so many more wonderfully awesome things like that. I'm kind of different now from all of the stuff that I wrote before in 2005-2006, but I will get (& have been getting) some new stuff up here soon (and I have so much more to add to my page), but it is still at least close enough to my older writing style (if not extremely close to &/or exactly like my older writing style)... I have so many poems, short stories, novels, etc. & I cannot wait to get back at it!! I hope that you enjoy reading my new and old material, and I hope that you guys will be excited to read my new poems and short stories! Anyway, enjoy reading my old and new poems & short stories that I made before, during, and after my parents shipped me off to my 10th boarding school which weren’t really bordering schools at all. Anyway, please enjoy yourselves and I hope that you will enjoy my old and new work(s) too! Please have wonderful & blessed days & evenings, thank you so much for following me (for lack of a better phrase), and thank you so much for all of your comments from my poems and short stories from2005 and beyond! I hope that I still have it (being able to write very well and not have writers block), but my writing style has changed, but just a little bit, but not too much, & I still have some really dark things (many of which are quite new) to talk about and/or write about, too...)! So, I hope that you guys will still love my older writing style, and hopefully you will like my newer writing style too!! Please take care of yourselves, and stay safe out there with this COVID-19 bullshit. Thanks again!
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