"What is a Kiss?" -Jasmine Mikan, 'Olivine Romance' by Snowden
"What is a Kiss?"
-by Jasmine Mikan
This work is a property of Snowden from AO3, taken from the fanfic 'Olivine Romance'
What is a kiss?
A dastardly desire, a union of the instruments,
Once reserved for sucking thumbs,
And swallowing fetid substance,
And festering germs,
Gateway to the putrid innards,
Exit for vomit and profanity,
Now locked upon another,
Pairing of the grotesque,
The binding of unsavory parts for the sake of-
What? Mutual affection? Mutual pleasure?
Yet there my classmates go, teasing each other's mouth-rims,
Throwing their PDA out in public as if willing and proud that the world-
Should see their lust put on display
Taunting us with an act so wholly moronic without relative context,
Without a subjective point of view,
To make amends for it.
It's just kissing,
Yet it's more than innocent touches of the lips,
For kissing is for kids, and more than kissing is for adults,
And for these classmates of mine who seek adulthood before their time,
I know kissing and more than kissing goes on beyond the bedroom doors,
Behind the stalls, under the stairwells, away in the woods,
And I've been left to chortle, alone,
Gazing at their stupidity, no partner in the pleasure that would justify it, and
"What is a kiss?"
And telling myself,
"How disgusting! How banal!"
And umpteen times over asking myself why should they enjoy each other like they do,
As I cannot see the reason, nor the motive, nor the opportunity,
Whimpering and begging to understand,
Seeking, searching; if only there were a way to make sense of this,
That somewhere between the earth and the stars there was a path through the darkness, to teach me where the sense lay in such a perverted, deviant action,
Made and forced and slaved to wonder, wonder, wonder-
If this could ever be made clear to me, if I should ever see their gentle smile reflected in the mirror, if ever I should look upon the world with their eyes so full of joy, if ever I should hear from my own throat the same voice of calm and certain and sublime satisfaction,
And still, still, still wondering-
If this sin they a call a kiss
Should be, could be, my lot, my downfall, my perversion-
My sorrow, my joy,
My pleasure, my bane,