Why isn't it Enough (Saturday 27 December, 2014)

By BetaWolfinVA

I chose you that day
Wednesday, twenty seven may two thousand nine
off date site
Adult Friend finder dot com
and met at your job at night

i was looking for someone
closer than 45 minutes
instead, i found you
i was looking for white but
found a black beauty

it was the luckiest day of my life
you changed my house, my clothes, life
and of all things dear
you even changed my glasses
let me grow my hair

our wedding was the
happiest day of my life
but i am taciturn
sedentary where you are
gregarious and cleaning

over the years we
have slowly drifted apart
maybe it started
when we got the damn xbox
and i fell asleep downstairs

a year after that
in twenty twelve i lost
my honor, your love
i thought you wanted to play,
but that is my quirk, not yours

is it loneliness
the fingertip deep groove in
my head from cannon
but my obsession with her
returned suddenly one day

we are raising my
first cousin once removed, girl
you are her mother
even reluctant you shine
happiest the three of us

why didn't you go
with me to fulfill my last
obligation to
the woman that destroyed my
life all those long years ago

since then i have been
suicidally depressed
but at least dreams are
still way too elaborate
for me to execute them

hopefully i can work through
my pain without assistance
if not, counseling
i cannot leave our daughter
without a father

but it would probably help
if you still loved me
if you wanted me back in
the bed we once shared
when once i could reach

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Copyright Saturday 27 December 2014 HHMCameron
Published on Saturday, December 27, 2014.     Filed under: "Depressed" and "Poetry"
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