Breath and Fear (1-3)

(before you read, feel free to just comment on one poem, you don't have to read all 3, im just putting them there that way they won't all be seperate, and they can be a group. thnx)

#1 (December 29, 2003)

The times I lie awake at night
In the cold corner of my room
all alone
with no one home-
No one except
Breath and Fear.

With a knife against my
fresh, deep skin
Seems like,
it is my only friend.
But you're still here
With every breath,
and all of my fears.

How can we see ourselves
Being who we are-
With all this breathing
and fear that we have.
How can we take all this misery
And pain?

This breath I hold so deeply,
so firm.-
And the fear I pray
Will soon leave me alone..

And maybe,
Just maybe...

I can end here to my dear friends,

Breath and Fear.


#2 (Undated) Near

Scars open then scars close,
When night comes and night goes.
I keep gasping for air
But my breath won't come.
I'm tugging at my hair,
Though fear stills me numb.
I shut my eyes,
Hearing voices all over.
Here is every lie
These thoughts stay forever.
For I try to catch my breath,
Although every minute that I can't,
It gives me fear.
I'll take anything but death,
As when I get closer take me near.
Shakeing at these spirits,
And rocking back and forth.
Suprisingly you won't hear it,
I cant take it anymore.
I try to scream,
Breathing is fairly hard.
Needing this to be a dream,
Yet fear is what you give.
Body collapsing at once,
So I cling to the floor.
Wishing to have a life's ounce,
I'm aching and so sore.
For I try to catch my breath,
Although every minute I can't
It gives me fear.
I'll take anything but death,
As when I get closer take me near.


#3 (November 11, 2005) Dead

I'm looking around to find,
That it was all a dream.
My knees start to knock,
I feel like you're here with me.

But your corpse is underneath the ground,
As dead as dead can be.
Then I hear that breathing sound,
And fear clings to me.

Motionless, Not even an inch,
I slowly turn and look.
But apparently I'm hearing things,
Because all I see is that book.

The one that I've read over and over
Ever since you died.
I stare so meaningless at the cover
And wish I hadn't lied.

The sweat is rolling down my face,
As I climb back in my bed.
This breath and fear won't be replaced
Because I'm the one that's dead.