making love [is this it?]

By Lotophagi

Version I

I would like
to make
love
to you
if
you
would
love me
like I matter
to you
do
I

?


do not wait
for me
to
make
the moves
just go ahead
and kiss
me
because
I am scared
that you
do not
want
me
.

do you?



Version II

I would like
to make
love
[or sex]
to you
if
you
would
love me
[lust however is fine]
like I matter
to you
[or arouse you]
do
I
[not necessarily matter, but do you want my body?]
?


do not wait
for me
to
make
the moves
[I’m a bit paranoid you’ll laugh]
just go ahead
and kiss
me
[or fuck me]
because
I am scared
that you
do not
want
me
[am I sexy enough for you?]
.

do you?
[my mouth is dry and panties wet]



Version III

I would like
to make
love
to you
[not sex]
if
you
would
love me
[as a whole, mind and body]
like I matter
to you
[as earth and universe]
do
I

?


do not wait
for me
[if you love me]
to
make
the moves
just go ahead
and kiss
me
[but gently with depth in mind]
because
I am scared
that you
do not
want
me
[to fulfil your own self]
.

do you?
[please love me]

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
© 2006 Lotophagi
Published on Wednesday, January 4, 2006.     Filed under: "Poetry"
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Comments on "making love [is this it?]"

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  • elisa On Monday, April 17, 2006, elisa (1616)By person wrote:

    yes..... just the words i was looking for......speaks for itself, this does.

  • Err0r On Monday, April 17, 2006, Err0r (365)By person wrote:

    Lolz I love you. :D Lolz *Faves*

  • AniDayz On Wednesday, April 12, 2006, AniDayz (820)By person wrote:

    dammit. this is absolute. fantastic. ...my comments are failing...this is stellar.

  • Vicious Pixie On Monday, March 20, 2006, Vicious Pixie (62)By person wrote:

    wow....it's like every sexual encounter i've ever had all wrapped into one delicious piece of work.....i likes

  • A former member wrote: Wow, this is hot. the intellectual deconstruction and the naked sexual energy.

  • Alanarchy On Friday, January 27, 2006, Alanarchy (1200)By person wrote:

    beckon hither, and coy. all at once. I love this one. Need without compromise, but the rules still apply. I love the composition of this, it conveys a sense of... not sure... frantic indecision, maybe? Ownage.

  • Mistress Shadow On Sunday, January 8, 2006, Mistress Shadow (252)By person wrote:

    I like version one the best and this actually made me angry at men for having such control in the way you presented this topic. This piece is well written and thought out. ~T

  • stuart_pid On Sunday, January 8, 2006, stuart_pid (135)By person wrote:

    i love this. it evolves very nicely but it seems like version I manages to already say what version II and III say but with a little more interpretation on the part of the reader. at any rate its amazing and that very first stanza is so pure and beautiful

  • stuart_pid On Sunday, January 8, 2006, stuart_pid (135)By person wrote:

    i am impressed as always

  • A former member wrote: oh yeah, sweet dreams tonight...what's the thermostat at? I kinda like the way each of the subtle changes from one version to the next reveals more, like self commentary or something...repetition with a difference (Derrida)

  • A former member wrote: So beautifully seductive and gentle, so penetrating and completely vulnerable; I think I now understand (too late) why my ex rarely initiated sex...thanks

  • Johny_D_Lewis On Saturday, January 7, 2006, Johny_D_Lewis (467)By person wrote:

    we all love you on here, this is a down to earth and yet very romantic peace

  • Err0r On Thursday, January 5, 2006, Err0r (365)By person wrote:

    ...awe. :( I like version two, couldn't we just stay there for awhile and dance among the hesitance and insecurity? :) Beautiful write.

  • blue On Wednesday, January 4, 2006, blue (1454)By person wrote:

    I'll go ahead and echo what everyone else has said here.. masterful pin pointed accuracy in poetic motion here. Take a bow lady, take a bow. =) ~b

  • Sin On Wednesday, January 4, 2006, Sin (1168)By person wrote:

    this was done masterfully in your sexy intellectual way...the longing and doubt bleed through the words...lovely write ~kristy

  • A former member wrote: this is more than great. i love it.

  • A former member wrote: I am drawn to this, almost, like a moth to a flame..it reveals many emotions towards this act in such a perfectly imaginative manner. Fabulously done, and thank you for sharing this.

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