aged paper [and broken glass]
By Six-Out
I'd rather watch tears roll down your face
than face this aged. framed-portrait of who you were.
we're never what we are. we were what we're meant to never be.
glass painted on a poem in a dark room. she'd cry
those blue-blood songs of ink running dry- and lead.hearted
silhouettes. and we wore the war paint of disaster
it followed us to our fate. tapered the wavering doubt.
drown it out. just drown it out.
in misconceptions
and I watched your smile crack. under pressure
these were no lines of age
stage-exit. style. only this time there was no one to applaud your bow
and these walls talk too much
we're sitting on cloud 9- and it's raining.
and I'm falling- born in the descent. waiting for the ground to give birth
because these stars never shut the fuck up
my hands are trembling.
and I'm waiting for you to shatter.
she's nothing.
and I'm waiting on that trigger finger to point the blame to me.
and her face runs under my tears. it's so beautiful.
Comments on "aged paper [and broken glass]"
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On Thursday, May 10, 2012, Clydes_Bonnie
(56) wrote:
incredible
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A former member wrote:
love it, the ending is so real and it all means so much, relly great :o)
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A former member wrote:
Your writing is just so beautiful. Somewhat melancholy, but I love it.
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On Thursday, September 29, 2005, Crysa
(33) wrote:
Someone suggested that I read your stuff, I'm very glad I did.
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On Thursday, August 25, 2005, abattoir
(115) wrote:
again, I'm left enfeeble.by the way it was.were. and you new, inevitably, what it would become.your style is mindblowing.
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On Sunday, August 21, 2005, Mahakala
(209) wrote:
leaves me with the feeling of regret yet I don't think that I have done anything to regret (well at least not yet)...great write six..
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On Sunday, August 21, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(358) wrote:
there are some killer lines in here... and the sense of it is borderline-pschotic, mournful, washed up, strung out, lost and lonely...
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On Sunday, August 21, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(358) wrote:
on the flipside... i don't dig.the random fullstops... only because you're also using them in the "correct" fashion. What's wrong with any of these: "-" "_" "~" ":" etc... the meaning vanishes out of this here and there...
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On Sunday, August 21, 2005, TheBardOfBlasphemy
(358) wrote:
get rid of those full stops. they fuck this up... unless you intend the reader to pause at those points... but that doesn't seem to fit... i even read it out loud to check...
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On Sunday, August 21, 2005, Six-Out
(1435) wrote:
Dramatic pauses, my male dear. ;)
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A former member wrote:
not bad
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On Monday, August 15, 2005, stormtalk
(729) wrote:
comment removed by DP admins
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A former member wrote:
Ground Control? Is this the lollipop factory?
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On Tuesday, August 16, 2005, Six-Out
(1435) wrote:
Are you calling me a sucker? ;)
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On Monday, August 15, 2005, glasshouse
(548) wrote:
Wow. Wow. -Glass
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On Sunday, August 14, 2005, Rachel
(213) wrote:
Jesus...
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On Sunday, August 14, 2005, Elegant Kiss
(182) wrote:
... "because these stars never shut the fuck up".. ! I'll have to come back, you beautiful monster.
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A former member wrote:
speechless. i love this.
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On Sunday, August 14, 2005, Possesion
(137) wrote:
So...amazing.
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On Sunday, August 14, 2005, sIo
(926) wrote:
dear god Jon. this made me cry.