To Keep Us From Getting Hurt

You might not go by this, but there are 10 things you should remember, know and do before you ever try to commit to a person or relationship. This is is no particular order.


1. Really and honestly think how far you want to go with this person. Think about consequences. Don't like kids? Neither do I.

2. Do your friends like your significant other? That is usually a big sign. If they can sense something wrong, as much as you don't want to admit it, they are most likely right.

3. Make yourself a list of 5 things that you absolutely would hate for your partner to believe in, talk about, do or say. If they do one of these, and you don't care, then you might have a keeper. (Example: The ex-girlfriend that moved in and threw away all your things/The ex-boyfriend that insisted that screaming at the television might actually make the Bengals win a game.)

4. They have an annoying habit you hate? Don't think that you don't have one that they are ignoring, so give them the benefit of the doubt. Yours is probably more annoying anyway. Biting your nails? Fine. Spitting them at people? Not so much.

5. Consider what they want. Yeah, his nasty brown couch is ugly as hell and you'd like nothing else better to do then run over it, burn it and run over it again just to make sure it's dead. But your pink ruffly bedspread (complete with 20 pink fluffy throw pillows!) is equally as horrifying. You like blue, they like green. Why not go for teal?

6. Now this is a hard one and most of you won't agree, but it's usually true. Once a cheater, always a cheater. Once a liar, always a liar. Contemplate that second chance carefully. Can your heart take that again?

7. Everyone has their own opinions. Just because yours differ doesn't mean they are any more correct then your partners. Listen to them, maybe wearing that WILL make you look like a transexual Woody Allen.

8. No one likes a clingy person. If they say back off, back off for a while. If they say leave them alone, leave for a while. Your partner should come around in time and it will make them more angry to know you don't respect them enough to listen to them or care enough to let them work this out before they socialize again.

9. Arguments are bound to happen. No one is perfect. I'm not trying to sound like a 3rd grade teacher, but don't accuse. Use "I" instead of "You" and talk calmly so that they know you are in control and capable of being an adult in hard situations.

10. Once you decide you love someone, completely and thoroughly, then do just that. Don't hold back your feelings. When they ask you what your thinking, tell them the truth. Communication is the key to a successful relationship.

Don't get hurt! At least consider what I am telling you. I don't feel like my heart being thrown and kicked and I care about DP and don't want the same for any of you, either.