Look in my eyes when I touch you

Look in my eyes when I touch you
and you will see there
feelings I deny
having grown over the months
with every word
every minute together
every passionate moment shared
every morning I wake with you
Feelings I can’t share
when your guard is up
fear in control
because you will push me away
to create the distance
you think you need
to protect yourself
to survive.

Look in my eyes when I touch you
and you will see there
the longing I hide
to hold you close every night
to hear your voice every morning
to share my life with you
Longing to fully experience with you
the many passions
that make you the man you are
Instead I pretend detached interest
letting you believe
it doesn’t really matter to me
so you don’t know
just how touched I am
when you let me see your soul.

Look in my eyes when I touch you
and you will see there
what I saw in yours
when the gin dulled your defenses
pulling your walls down.
You watched me
all night
with that tender look
in your beautiful eyes
that said so much
made me feel so secure
so warm
so special
That tender look
I know shown back from mine
whenever our eyes met
whenever we laughed
whenever we touched
whenever we kissed.
I fell asleep
your arms holding me close
your kisses raining softly
on my lips and face.

Look in my eyes when I touch you
and you will see there
what you will never hear from my lips
as long as
you willingly immerse yourself
in your freezing pool
of self-pity
suspending all emotion
mourning a woman
who never loved you
more than herself
who never put your needs
above her own
who will never love you
like I would.