without a car

i was walking through thick fog
to get a pack of cigarettes
rural living
and it felt a little like trying to get
into heaven
when everytime i came upon lights
the refractive properties of the water on the
air formed a halo a few steps in front of me
and i could see a shadow of myself inside
my shape but no face
and the way it played would have me thinking
that a few more steps would have me safely through
the carrot dangles
but my feet would not take me to the other side
the faster i went trying to get inside
the faster the light faded
until the fog swallowed it all and
heaven was just a distant memory