Dreams or Dri(u)nk

Your words speak over me.
They flow behind my ears, and
around my neck,
not fully entering my brain,
i'm not really listening to you
i'm just watching you speak.

Your everpresent force surrounds me
with its tendrils of tantalizing
tastiness. Too many touches of your skin
have led me to thoughtless endevors
of your memory.

I look at you and breathe.

You still sit there,
talking.
I feel nothing.
It is as if we never embraced.
never touched.
Never were.

Exhale.

Yet..
(and the thoughts flee...)

Emptiness reigns
A thought flitters,
a gossemer tail left
by a fairy, her dust
like Tinkerbell's
trails away in to the night.

(is the haze and illusions from the drink?)

That illuisoned thought
brings forth memory,
and i wander around in memories i think are real.

The smoke that leaves your lips is
lingering in the light,
filtered light,
from Light Beer,
and clear, clandestine glasses,
nothing leaves your lips like
the smoke does.

But i've forgotten the illusion
already,
i'm floating home now...
dreaming? or drinking? driving
on a driveway,
continuously ramming my car
into the garage door...

(which part of this dream is real?
You? or the crumpled front end of my car?)

Every time i look at you,
is like the first time since we split.
every time I realize i see you
is another moment to remember
you are not
coming
home
with
me.