By SolApathy

Carnage of choices made
Purgatory of dreams lost in the darkness
My soul is their coffin
Restitution for my sins
-My eternal battle within
Worth or worthless?
 I can never decide
I burn my bridges with self-inflicted lies
Driven to self-harm
My emotional cascade
I battle in this war with dreams of you
Sacrificing memories like pawns
--In a war I started & never wanted to win
Losing slowly my punishment for perceived sins
I’ve conjured from within
It’s why I’m faceless in this room
No one ever sees me—As for so long I haven’t been
Drugs castrated my cares
(Or so I made myself believe)
Beyond a depth you see--I grieve

Laissez faire as they bleed me dry
Is all you'll ever see in my eyes
I ponder

Does one with no memories ever cry?
I screamed as you stopped by
Burning into your mind I was already long gone
Even as the memories were still strong
Tears filled my IV drip as I took this fated trip
Mixed with the depression of someone ill-equipped
You left that day and never returned
My regret it burned and burdened
Weighing upon my soul until it crushed my resolve to call
10 years ago, today or was it ten minutes that just passed?
The chaos of my hurt burned so fast
Knowing now I’ll never care
I swallowed all the cheeked pills I stowed
Left you a note just so you knew I was never truly gone
I just needed you to feel you could finally move…On

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Copyright 2018 SolApathy
Published on Tuesday, September 25, 2018.     Filed under: "Poetry"

Author's Note:

...As my mind tortured my soul I felt that my only solution was to let...go
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Comments on "...1223"

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  • I IS ME On Wednesday, September 26, 2018, I IS ME (924)By person wrote:

    Great piece with several great lines please continue

  • Lab Rat On Wednesday, September 26, 2018, Lab Rat (158)By person wrote:

    My son was born to this song, ironically the write reminds me of alot of the time surrounding that. Memory lane, always an odd visit. Thanks for posting this

  • Bornfrompain On Wednesday, September 26, 2018, Bornfrompain (836)By person wrote:

    Brilliant write as always! - BFP

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