...Terror of the Pine

By SolApathy

A winters dream is the nightmare I scream
Watching in silent horror of holiday glee
I vomit at the sight of a Christmas tree
Ornaments sparkling as they are hung
Just another memory of being stung
Brutalized for childhood smiles I didn’t deserve
How quickly I learned to stare vacantly to preserve
Protecting my body from just another scar
A switch from a tree- dry-- needles piercing my memoir
How I dreamed I was a porcupine as I removed needles deep
Don’t I dare scream or speak
Sign of the meek
Only more punishment if I make a peep
My present -- time alone from fear
Oh god I hear her footsteps again, near

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© 2018 SolApathy
Published on Friday, January 12, 2018.     Filed under: "Poetry"

Author's Note:

As you dream of presents under the tree--My only wish is for her to leave me...Be
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Comments on "...Terror of the Pine"

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  • Drea On Monday, January 15, 2018, Drea (1417)By person wrote:

    The pain of this...I can't explain to you how much this hurt.

  • Kaiser Black On Thursday, January 11, 2018, Kaiser Black (1499)By person wrote:

    It’s a fear that never truly leaves. Powerful write my friend, I hope one day the memories let you be.

  • dwells On Thursday, January 11, 2018, dwells (5543)By person wrote:

    I always got as many whacks as both my older brother and younger sister combined; but then too I was usually the ringleader... Went into this thinking a walk in the woods. Definitely a novel twist on Christmas, sadly Sol. Cheers! - Dan

  • Cassette On Thursday, January 11, 2018, Cassette (1293)By person wrote:

    that's terrible :( as someone who wrestled half-dead tree down a flight of stairs, I can commiserate with needles digging against your skin, but to have them hit against you... I'm so sorry that you've experienced such a thing.

  • midnights voice On Thursday, January 11, 2018, midnights voice (834)By person wrote:

    I'm assuming child abuse . Children should have nothing but smiles on their faces . A true reality that is often displaced .

  • Rebs On Thursday, January 11, 2018, Rebs (949)By person wrote:

    Holy fucking shit, dearest! I can't help it but to clutch my chest as I read this because to have suffered cruelly like that is awful. *big hugs to you* Rebs:).

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