Gutless

  I`m drowning
in an ocean
of filtered water
 
it is obvious that
I`m in too deep
 
in too deep because I`ve allowed
you to ingest me whole
to permeate the recesses
of what made me solitary once
 
I could very easily fend
systematically loathing you
unremorsefully begging you
to regurgitate the spent
of my flesh and frame
and make me sovereign again
 
like when you used to look at me -
with love
yet,
invoking an immense sensatory
of your lust I hungered for
 
but drowning, today, is the most
logical approach - this filtered water
pungent`ing my soul,
exterminating my sins,
exorcism`ing my spinal demons
 
like casting out the Archangel of Guts
from within a paradisonal hell -
sinless, spineless, demonless
 
I`m a fucking pathetic gutless waste
to what makes a soul humanely pure
 
I guess
this is what it means
after one says, ``I do``.