Left In Memory

Alas, I have been left alone in my memory
All I do is sit in my mind made of emery.
I am numb, I am lost, and I am dying
I am hurting, but you'll never catch me crying.
Pain is weakness and I refuse to beg 
No one will ever let me speak segue.
I wish, oh how do I wish, I'd succeeded 
I am done, my will and energy depleted.
The remembrance of the attempts
The toxins were sadly exempt.
These people look at me and scoff
When all I did was fucking cough.
Confront me face to face off school grounds
Your bones breaking will be audible sounds.
Talk big in front of your buddies and girlfriend
Let's see just how far your neck will bend.
I love te feel of the self bloody satisfaction
I will not show any signs of dissatisfaction.
I love the darkness and hatred I obtain
Mercy is something I do not sustain.
I want to feel my steady breath fade and quit
My will has vanished over time, I admit it.
Why do you linger in my mind and soul
I am soil and you are a crafty vole.
Ravaging my fertility you are a rodent
Every day, Every hour, Every moment.
All I want is my freedom from you
I have no idea on how or what to do.
Why did you leave in the way you did
You lied and my feelings I barely hid.
Left me again, alone and suicidal
My death will be secret, not viral.
This is the end, I am on Death's doorstep
He keeps a deathly, bliss homestead.