fins aren't wings and won't help anyway

i keep sink-thinking 
in ophelia like breaths
every draw pours into me
filling my lungs to bursting
with the cold echo of  disregard

i swam once like a mermaid 
in the depths of a vow of forever
 

not remembering i swam to close to contentment
grasping at it like a lotus in full bloom
i floated too near too comfortable in love
forgot to surface and cry out for help
before the undertow pulled me down forever


i was a fish attempting to fly
and you were the surge that told me i couldn't