I KILL KIDS AT BIRTHDAY PARTIES

By Jesse Guzman

HELLO BOYS AND GIRLS!
LETS HAVE SOME FUN!
While your parents are drinking,
play with this gun!
A game of Cops & Robbers.
SHOOT AND KILL!
OOPS!! You have a Boo Boo?
Here, take this pill.
Feeling better now?
ALL RIGHTY! LETS GO!
But before we play again,
I think you aught to know.
To drink plenty of fluids,
so you wont dehydrate.
I'm not kidding boy,
It's for your own sake.
Heres some Corona
that your dad left behind.
Don't worry son,
he just passed out.
He wont mind.
So drink it all,
to the very last drop.
Now we can play, but this time,
you can be the cop
POINT AND AIM!
SHOOT YOUR FRIENDS!
ITS JUST A GAME!
THEY NEVER END!
YES! YOU'VE WON!
ALL THE KIDS ARE ON THE GROUND!!
Now help me hide them,
and dont make a sound.
This next game is called
HIDE & SEEK!
Don't worry kid,
your friends are just asleep.
Now help me hide them before
the parents wake up.
UH OH! YOUR VOMITING!
Here, spit in this cup.
OK! HERES MY VAN!
The girls go in first.
DON'T BE SILLY KID!
THATS JUST KETCHUP ON THEIR SHIRTS!
THANK YOU KID! I LOVE YOU TO DEATH!
NOW IT'S YOUR TURN!
ENJOY YOUR LAST BREATHE!
OH WAIT!
BEFORE I FORGET!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY LITTLE FRIEND!

Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.

Published on Sunday, December 4, 2011. Filed under: "Fiction" and "Poetry"

Comments on "I KILL KIDS AT BIRTHDAY PARTIES"

On Tuesday, April 29, 2014, Mad Hatter (13) wrote:

A sick and twisted poem indeed, I like it a lot. Very creepy and you can almost see the scene play out like in a horror movie. This could also be titled John Wayne-Gacy.
A former member wrote: This is sick. And sick is what i dig so, cheers! Great work!
A former member wrote: Capitalization is spot-on here. It really creates a kind of murderous-clown-slash-psychotic-playmate type feel.
A former member wrote: I'm damn sure I remember this from du some time ago. I laughed then and nearly pissed myself this time. It's nice to see something comical here for a change. Rock on man.
A former member wrote: This is genius xD
A former member wrote: this is sick and somewhat funny
On Wednesday, February 27, 2013, BetaWolfinVA (795) wrote:

bloody freaking effing insane, wild, thanks for the read :)
A former member wrote: OMG, you sir, are a genius! Hahaha, the ketchup thing was what my mum used wheni was little XD
A former member wrote: this disturbing, horrible, and just so fucked up... I LOVE IT! such an amazing flow and it had me laughing throughout! wow.. nicely done. never read anything that was such a messed story that i liked. Thanks for sharing!
On Tuesday, January 15, 2013, Dreaming in Stanzas (303) wrote:

This just made me so fucking happy. Murdering of children at a birthday made me happy. That makes both of us twisted human beings but if you have me, Dev, Zombie, and Haunted all in awe then chances are we all fit right in to one sick ass group.
On Monday, December 31, 2012, xZombie Poptartzx (334) wrote:

This was so sick and twisted omg. i think im in love!! haha brilliant!
A former member wrote: very nice, loved the flow lol i read this and visions of John Wayne Gacy danced around in my head dressed as Pogo the clown...loved the ending with the van...now drive them to me so i can play with them >;-)
A former member wrote: Loved it, not that into these types of poems, but this one is very well written... will read more of your works
A former member wrote: Wow its John Wayne Gacy's theme song! I love this poem! Are you still avalible for Bday Parties?lol
A former member wrote: Okkkkkkkkkkay then... LOVED IT!
A former member wrote: Yo scalpel rape you rock with your insane cerebral cortex hope you stay sane the more you write insane
On Saturday, December 10, 2011, AllenTaylor (39) wrote:

As horrifying this is, I...how the hell do you cross the threshhold of morality and enter this realm of utter-fuckup? Damn you are good!
On Monday, December 5, 2011, whisperingwalls (219) wrote:

*Sickness boner* I love the twisted narration of this piece. Like a jester weaving a macabre tale, nicely done sir.
On Monday, December 5, 2011, rosemaiden (185) wrote:

omg that is hilariously horrible....can't stop laughing lol!!! that is just insane
On Sunday, December 4, 2011, Dragonfly (13) wrote:

This made my head hurt. To be honest. I was on the verge of crying, laughing, and calling the cops. Lol, no, but this was very... Let's just sat this was a first experience read and I was surprised by how much I liked it...
On Sunday, December 4, 2011, dwells (4285) wrote:

Sounds like the last birthday party to me. Never did like killer clowns, thanks.
On Sunday, December 4, 2011, haunted (850) wrote:

scalpel rape you are the craziest, sickest, no holds barred poet in this peice! awesome dude. very creative and i just think this is so entertaining. and like you, i dont give a shit about the consequences of being able to laugh as i read this as im sure you took great pleasure in writing this. did you wear clown makeup when you wrote this. cause john wayne gacy pops in my head for some reason. none the less you have if nothing else proved you are definitely a bad influence! i love you!! kick ass!
On Sunday, December 4, 2011, Devilish (2658) wrote:

Our love child!!!! Lol...
On Sunday, December 4, 2011, Devilish (2658) wrote:

By the way your a nut!! A true breed.. Lmao...
On Sunday, December 4, 2011, Devilish (2658) wrote:

All eyes are no longer on me.. You take the crown... "Bows" Hell yeah...
A former member wrote: WOW! I am speechless! You totally deliver on this...and cause the reader to enter the mind of a killer! I love it! Excellent write!