So Much For Kung Fu

By Malcholm Dark

You were here, I was happy
Now you're gone, I am sad.
I'm feeling kind of crappy
I hope that makes you glad.

You are gone, gone, gone
And I have an empty bed.
You moved on, on, on
With my kung fu teacher Ted.
.
.
.
.
.
I have drown in an Asian pool of fantasy
I am student, you are master, can't you see?

Daggers in my back from Fu Manchu
I had life, I had love, Ted had you.

Cut down by a series of propaganda
My love was thrashed by a kung fu panda.

You chopped me down like a Bruce Lee clone
When you left me here all alone.
.
.
.
And if that ain't enough, let me tell you what!

I hope...
your tires blow out
your car blows up
your waist fills out
your weight goes up
your credit runs out
your rates go up
the dog walks out
and crime goes up.
.
.
.
But what really angers me most is...
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
No more karate lessons from Ted.
.
.
.
"Everybody is kung fu fighting..."


Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited. Ask the author first.
Copyright 2010 Malcholm Dark
Published on Tuesday, November 16, 2010.     Filed under: "Comedy" and "Poetry"
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Comments on "So Much For Kung Fu"

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  • A former member wrote: I really enjoyed this. Very different from my reads thus far, left me with a smile. Thanks

  • A former member wrote: hahaha... this was a fun read.... so light and limerick-ish but at times there was something else, perhaps, just under the surface "I had life, I had love, You had you." the contrast of the warm happy with the cold shoulder in succinct line.... the wishes killed me... Ted... look out. haha. excellent write, funny parody maybe.... great humor.

  • A former member wrote: Lol:)i know its hard to go one on one with Ted but i am sure you can run him over if you are quick:)it was really fun to read plus the kung fu panda reference was hilarious lol:)thanks for sharing:)

  • lupus tenebrae On Tuesday, November 16, 2010, lupus tenebrae (872)By person wrote:

    I'll bet Ted resorted to the old "wax on, wax off" routine again lol. I couldn't help but think of the song afterward, now I won't be able to sleep. Another excellent piece Dark, hilarious,write on. Scholar

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