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...I'm Sick....
By CjPsychotic
(This is for everyone who has caught the flu virus this year...those of
you who haven't: it's a beauty :) )
A sphere, proud and never shy,
Grants its rays to reign on passerbys,
As, along Earth's rim, it begins to rise
Above the darkened cloud-filled skies.
These gray puffs bring about chill'd rain
And viral vapor laced with pain
( The kind humans abhor and disdain);
They set out for war on this worldly plane.
Mercenaries infect one by one,
Without ever brandishing a gun.
A tangled spy's web is spun.
The world of man shall be undone.
Mouths now spew harsh flem and flak,
While atop the brow is a moist cold pack.
Now days look bleak and wryly black;
~Its time for some old fashioned pay-back.
Onward to the modern apothecary,
Who's perscription arsenal we soon will bury
Deep into our core, while still wary
The invaders will fight hard and parry.
...........
The groggy aftermath has finally come
And the villainous "bugs" have been undone.
But they will wait
And mutate,
For next years wholesome time of "fun."
Unauthorized Copying Is Prohibited.
Ask the author first.
© 2009 CjPsychotic
Comments on "...I'm Sick...."
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A former member wrote:
ah my friend, you do it so well, damn you and your analytical ways. i liked the concept but just to be nit picky because i am after all your best friend and confidant, it's prescription and i would possibly change bury to inquiry just because why would you bury prescriptions?
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A former member wrote:
Amazing. You take what's such mundane, even tedious, subject matter and turn it into an amazing piece of well-structured poetry. I love this. And it helps that I feel like the little invaders have outgunned me at the moment...
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A former member wrote:
Hahahah this is hilarious! It's a great poem. I feel sorry for those who got the flu vaccine, I don't think it works. Plus we all know the bird flu was manufactured and there's something else to that, kind of forget. Great poem.
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On Saturday, April 11, 2009, ebonyamore
(101)
wrote:
*laughs* this is the sort of mad-hatter poetry I can really get behind because, honestly, who writes a sonnet to the flu? Huge points for creativity on this one. And AGAIN...your word choices are spot on. I loooved the entire closing stanza. and the phrase viral vapor laced with pain. My one true critique? Its nitpicky again but I love free verse poetry and I love Shakespearean sonnets equally as much. But to me, let your free verse be free verse and let your rhymed and metered stanzas follow hard and fast their mathematical formulas. To me, rhymed poem should have a slightly tighter cadence. But again...just me.
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On Thursday, March 26, 2009, The Lipstick Factor
(290) wrote:
*lol*--very, very original. Delightful read and about the only fun thing in the world regarding the flu--well done!
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On Thursday, March 19, 2009, Echoes of Orpheus
(359) wrote:
I've got a seemingly rare gift of immunities to most illnesses. I miss maybe one day a year due to being sick. Perfect attendence in my 3 final years of highschool to prove it. And yes that also proves I was a nerd... haha. a poem dedicated to the common flu is a not so common thing :P Interesting read.
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